When I reflect and think about 2020 I do not wish this year away or want the days to go faster so it will be over. No! When the Refiner’s Fire turned up in my life, I decided to stand on some powerful truths.
“Everyone’s going through a refining fire sooner or later, but you’ll be well-preserved, protected from the eternal flames. Be preservatives yourselves. Preserve the peace.” – Mark 9:49-50
Let me preface some things before I get to these truths. These truths are written in Father’s living word. I had read them many times. But when I stepped into His Refining Fire, things from places within me that did not believe these truths came oozing out of me. Places in me that were afraid of these truths and even hated these truths.
While it is and was so good, it did feel really hard at times. It felt hard because it awakened patterns and thought processes that didn’t belong inside of me. Some of these patterns and thought processes I formed from my own life experiences and some were generational. None of them is too hard for my Jesus to rewrite and awaken His truth in me.
The Fire is and was hard for a moment but it invited me to search my heart with TRUTH. Truth being Father, The One who made truth.
“You draw near to those who call out to you, listening closely, especially when their hearts are true. Every one of your godly lovers receives even more than what they ask for. For you hear what their hearts really long for and you bring them your saving strength. “ – Psalms 145:18-19
In the beginning of this blog I referenced the truths as “these truths” but from here on out they are ”My Truths” and you are welcome to receive them as your own. Jesus doesn’t play favorites.
Peter said, “Now I know for certain that God doesn’t show favoritism with people but treats everyone on the same basis. It makes no difference what race of people one belongs to. If they show deep reverence for God, and are committed to doing what’s right, they are acceptable before him, I choose to believe that ALL things are purposed.” – Acts 10:34
Yup… ALL THINGS!
That means all the things that have happened this year that have been hard and sometimes really ugly.
I was married this year and the minute I said, “I do” and my amazing husband and I began to uncleave from our families, things began to stir on both sides.
Throw in a pandemic, a move and an election….. well it felt like a lot!
Resting in the Storm
Initially I wanted it all to go away. I wanted there to just to be “peace”. But my heart wanted real peace, the kind that surpasses all understanding. So, I chose to press in, sometimes with tears (Ok a lot of times with tears) but Father knew I was willing. In that willingness He showed me how ALL things are purposed. The purposed things are invitations for me to go deeper and come up higher with Him, WHERE I BELONG.
If Jesus could truly rest in a storm then so can I. (Mark 8:23-27)
So I said yes to the invitation to go deeper and begin to open up my heart and let my King search my heart.
“God, I invite your searching gaze into my heart. Examine me through and through; find out everything that may be hidden within me. Put me to the test and sift through all my anxious cares.” – Psalms 139:23
In the searching I found that there was rest for me. The truth is that all these “battles” had already been won by my King. The searching that remained was for me to handle anything within me that didn’t believe that. I awakened to the understanding that I don’t have to fight this like some crazy woman. No, I get to lean into Father, rest in His presence, see that it’s already won and awaken to ALL OF MY TRUTHS THAT CAME FROM HIM.
Nothing goes to waste and Papa (God) uses all things for good.
Here we are again with that powerful word “ALL”. So, armed with my truths, I realized that the Refiner’s Fire is necessary to begin to understand that all things are purposed and that I’m made to live from a place of rest. And then of course the truth that He uses it “ALL”, truly fits.
Nothing goes to waste with my loving King.
He used every bit of it to teach me how good I am which leads me to truth number three.
God created ALL people and at the very core of each person they are GOOD.
All of these truths are for me. I don’t write them with people in mind hoping they’ll get them and fix themselves. No, I hold the mirror up to me! Before I could believe that each person is good at the root, I had to ask Jesus to search out the lies in me. Search out all the lies that told me I wasn’t good and that told me I needed to earn people’s “likes and love”. I had to awaken to the truth that when He formed me He looked at me and He said “My daughter….YOU ARE GOOD,” having done nothing more than breathe His breath.
Diamonds, Pearls and Caterpillars
The Refiner’s Fire is JESUS!
So with MY truths I realized there’s a lot of treasure for me when the Fire’s turned up. I have not arrived at understanding these truths in their fullness, but that’s ok because what I’ve learned about my Papa (God) is that for Him it’s all about relationship, not about me getting it right.
Diamonds are made under pressure.
Pearls are found in the depths of the sea.
Caterpillars transform hidden in tight quarters.
If all creation tells me that pressure, time and depth bring beautiful things, then that applies to me!
2020 thank you for not backing down. Jesus, I thank you for holding me up as capable to uncover my truths and for showing me so much love.
By Madison Gonzalez
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